Did I mention how vain I am? When I was young, oh so many years ago, my mother would drag me to the “big” city several times a year. We would march up and down the streets, window shopping or stepping purposefully through the stores. I trailed behind her, wincing at my aching feet, shod in the latest patent leather flats. My white socks, thin and lacy, would creep down my heels. My legs protested, but not my lips. Oh no, I never interrupted my mother on her mission to find the perfect outfits. And, truth be told, I did get an ice cream treat when she finally petered out and needed a break. Perhaps that’s why I can still run circles around my girlfriends. I experienced boot camp — for shopping. I guess that’s why I’m not an online shopper; it’s just too easy.
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The only “out” I gave myself was hosiery: no amount of lipstick and shiny hair can distract from balding tights or festering socks. “Not shopping” is no longer a matter of physically avoiding shops (though that helps). These days, you can blow the funds destined for next month’s utility bills on a frock after three glasses of Gran Cerdo and as many clicks of a mouse. Purchases that got away flirt with you knowingly from search engine sidebars. I diligently unsubscribed from tempting newsletters, severed bonds with websites that lure with special offers and exclusive discounts, and sloughed off the mailing lists for private sales that flatter with the suggestion of privileged access. Every garment on the rail was laundered, darned and ironed until they licked the skin with the crisp luxury of just-changed sheets. I re-auditioned impulse purchases, wearing an awkward skirt sideways and an overly conceptual sweater inside out. I became skilled at layering to conceal holes. I often experienced some gulf between expectation and reality when dressing Even then, the yen to buy would occasionally hit.
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